Gerald Thompson was a resourceful man who went through life selling camel-toe-nail polish to Arabs and dog paw wax to Eskimos, but enough of his old accomplishments. Always looking to fill an unseen niche, Mr. Thompson came upon the idea of putting to use all the knowledge stored in the heads of septuagenarians and octogenarians and hired them out as consultants in many trades. Being the first to organize and sell these skill sets at very affordable rates, Gerald opened the door for an information service that draws on the expertise of thousands of professionals with millions of hours of experience. It took off like a rocket. Utilizing this asset, a company called: The Underground Wheelchair was formed as these employees needed no fringe benefits. All that was required was a computer and a nursing home bed to lie in. The desire to make lots of money had left their brains at the same time mobility had left their bodies. They could no longer play with their grandchildren, and their own children viewed them as a nuisance. The last redeeming quality they had left was decades of experience permanently wired in a brain that could still access that library. They made very few mistakes, like they did in their youth, because all the background noise of life had disappeared. They lived on applesauce and oatmeal. Every time a huge engineering solution was required, the Underground Wheelchair was hired for pennies, while the expensive new meat, fresh out of college, watched and learned. The company made a ton of money, which attracted the sharks of industry. It wasn’t long before kidnapping of these relics occurred daily. Nursing home security was beefed up, but with enough bribe money, even the pope would sell out. Alarms and locking wheels did not work as thieves are a clever lot. Whenever you drive by a nursing home and see an old individual being pushed by a younger person. Sound the alarm! It’s a Geriatric Trafficking in progress!
Torked Truth 