Hertz and Enterprise are scrambling to be competitive in the car rental world as Joy Riding (JR, or Junior, as it is known on the streets) has taken hold and doesn’t appear to be loosening its grip. JR first started when a man of questionable character and unsound scrupules decided to rent out his garage to an individual who needed to store his surplus vehicle. Upon taking possession of said automobile, he Googled “how to disconnect the odometer on a late model vehicle” and proceeded to rent the ride out to some juvenile delinquents for hot cash. The rest is Capitalistic Chronicals. The word spread rapidly as teenagers couldn’t wait to get their feet on someone else’s accelerator pedal. Mum’s the word in this industry as rumors were spread that a Car Cartel was running this escapade, and ratting them out was a guaranteed trip to a car crusher in a trunk. Everything was running smooth, and other operators jumped in on the lucrative larceny as unwitting car owners were supplying the rides. The operation grew like a teenage penis, and car thefts nearly disappeared. No sense risking a felony when some nice man will rent you a ride in a fairly new, safe, and legal set of wheels without the hassle of having some government issued driver’s license and an equally traceable debit card. Just pull out the cash and go have fun cruising the avenues. With the fun supervised by the threat of getting crushed in a trunk, everything was cool. Boys got to go places that their parents wouldn’t take them to, and girls could find rides just by opening their legs like a garage door opener. Pregnancies were averted by having the young lady ride home with the passenger’s heated seat on high. Heat kills sperm. With a few hundred in cash and a grand retainer, all the cool kids were cruising around in surplus vehicles that were making everyone happy, including the unsuspecting car’s owner who was overjoyed to find an individual who rented out his garage for half the going rate.
Torked Truth 