TP. 110 A THREE BAGGER

Physical attractions are the magnetic fields that bring the birds and bees together for another generation under the sun. The mammal gang includes a host of quadripeds, including a species known as Homo Sapiens, that traded in 2 of their legs for arms. That way, they could bring food up to their mouths instead of lowering their heads to their meal. It’s a common sense tactic that uses gravity to get the chow down the gullet, and by looking at the size of today’s humans, it’s obviously working. Anyhow, this breed relies on sight to choose their mates, as looks are the predominant tool for procreation. Caveclowns learned long ago that additional enhancement helped drag in the suitors, so earrings made of shiney stones, hides of different colored fur, bird bones laced into the head hair, tits pulled up with slings and animal blood applied to the lips were common cosmetics worn by the females. It worked. Receptive females now watched as the males got into a fighting frenzy just to be the successful inseminator. During the humping ruckus, clothes and cosmetics fell off, and when the climax came and went, Mr. Cave Clown looked down and saw a panting pile of exhausted sweaty hair and immediately realized he’s been duped. No matter. Nature installed neuron infested components down undirt to encourage a repeat performance in case of failed fertilization. But egos were maturing as the cave people were transcending from animals up to savages. They didn’t want to be spotted having sex with an ugly ape, so they wore the scalps of butchered animals or victims of war, as the Native Americans later exercised. These disguises prevented embarrassment if someone had mounted an ugly mate. One scalp (also known as a bag) was for the female, and the other was worn by the male just in case her’s fell off. A 3 bagger is a more modern term that signifies really ugly. If the first 2 fall off, a 3rd made out of plastic will suffocate the ugly fucker.