11/27/2018
The future holds an exciting outlook for the many who were born in the Cold War Era. Convinced that man would surely obliterate himself and the planet as we know it, these seniors are amazed at the peaceful and harmonious coexistence that is occurring now. The historians have placed this pivot point in time (2022CE), when hatred used to boil over previously, to today’s earth, now known as the ball of bliss. That was the year that the TIGHTWAD Company was granted a license to distribute its product: salmon semen. Placed right up there with the Wright brothers’ invention of the airplane, which was responsible for many benefits (transportation), and a few drawbacks (weapons delivery systems); TIGHTWAD to date, has only proven favorable. Psychologists have known for centuries that the two chemicals responsible for small conflicts and full-blown wars are testosterone and estrogen: with the pent-up male hormone being the most destructive. TIGHTWAD has shown that by milking the male fish, it has lowered aggression and has given the females tight glowing skin. It has a seen a drastic decline in human craziness. Once the results became obvious, the tribal owners of TIGHTWAD did something unheard of in the capitalistic society, they walked away from billions of dollars and gave their secrets away. They also took their prior profits and went around America and built small outdoor stations resembling old telephone booths on nearly every corner in all towns and cities. These booths had a seat in them where a woman who was feeling “not so pretty”, could go in, sit down, and wait for a fish makeover. It wouldn’t be long before some man with a sack of salmon semen would go in there and give her a free “facial”. Calmness and satisfaction now ran rampant in the streets. Gone was jealousy, pent up anger, and frustration that carried into everyday life and created conflict. The crime rate and confrontations disappeared wherever the FACIAL FACTORIES appeared.
Torked Truth 