In the last few decades, genealogy has become a booming industry as record access has improved, and the Mormons are willing to share their extensive, meticulous information for a fee. Making for a simple Christmas or 50 plus birthday present, these informative, but questionable, results are fodder for fables. The whole process can break down because written records prior to the 1800’s are usually missing due to fires or poor record keeping. Current genealogy companies use DNA to locate your branch, and then start shoveling in famous people from the past to embellish the results. Quite a few Americans can trace their roots back to Pocahontas who must have spent her entire fertile life on her back conceiving children. If someone asks you where you came from, merely point to your alcohol tainted drink, and say, “I came from here.” The vast majority of people will agree, booze makes an excellent fertilizer when it comes to harvesting children. Sara entered Gibberanty’s trailer with 2 bottles of wine in tow. Her basal temperature dropped this morning and her desperateness took command. Gibberanty was unknowingly going to get raped tonight. The evening started slowly with subjects that he had mastered: crop raising, weather patterns, and trailer repair. When he tried to explain his vivid dreams with scientific marvels and creatures with fantastic knowledge, Sara would redirect his expertise in rabbit husbandry. Initially rejecting her offers of wine consumption, he finally succumbed to her pouring small portions down his throat as she stood above him with her semi opened blouse right at his mouth elevation. Random collisions with his beard and her breasts resembled a floppy brush car wash. Ethyl alcohol was being pumped by a racing heart right to his brain at escape velocity. Gibberanty was in unfamiliar territory as he had no exposure to the toxic tea during his lifetime. Clothes started to peel free from their human hangers and exposed hidden tooling. 

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