12/5/2019
This is one of the few times in the history of mankind where a country’s government voted to avoid war, but the citizens took it upon themselves to go to war anyway. The normally peaceful and pleasant inhabitants of that northern country with the most shoreline in the world had enough of American audacity and like David, took on the most powerful Goliath the world has ever known. Numbering nearly 30 million strong, this collection of children, women, senior citizens, physically impaired individuals, 1.4 million native Americans, and the working class of fit males have joined the ranks of the nearly 100,000 Canadian Armed Forces. This puts their army at 15 times more massive than the combined Chinese military, formerly the largest in the world. This camaraderie and complete organization took the world and especially the Americans by surprise. Who knew that by taking away someone’s sunshine, it would provoke such hostile behavior? No matter; the mightiest and most modern military in the world would make short work of this unforeseen and slightly annoying uprising. When the plans for a stealth border crossing and infiltration to America’s capitol, Washington DC, was discovered, 3 layers of military machinery surrounded the Swamp. Tanks, artillery, and 20 divisions of soldiers formed that defense. The Canadians look and act just like Americans, so the Generals knew that the detection of these covert operations was key. All Canadians were educated in basic American history, more so than its own citizens, so infiltration was relatively easy. They were all coached in avoiding ending all their conversations with the word, “EH?”, which made them blend right in. Like the War of 1812, the goal was to burn the White House to the ground and seize all other government buildings and officials. The plan was compromised and sabotaged by having all the major American politicians move to Miami, Florida, the Cayman Islands and to safehouses located in the Ukraine.
Torked Truth 