GOING VIRAL

10/17/2020

Those tiny infectious pricks that float around the planet, looking for entry into a living cell so that they can utilize the mechanisms within to replicate, are known as viruses. Because Mother Nature did not endow these little dickheads with their own reproduction organs, they were forced to hijack the organic genitalia that resides in complex cells. It’s not their fault. Mama Nat saw fit to throw these little particles into the mix because she didn’t want to have a runaway organism that would take the reins of Planet Earth and create a monopoly. She hit the nail on the head because more than 99% of all life that ever existed on earth is now extinct. Coming up with a blob of RNA, and some amino acids to house the half an egg within, was pure genius in that this little creep can get into all forms of life and upset the higher ups. Just to make it fair, Ma N. required those freeloaders to gain entry into the locked cell by 3D matching the cell receptors. No match, no entry. This kept a reasonably, diversified stream of life in a constant flux. As humans slowly unlock the knowledge of nature, they think they can conquer all obstacles. Huge Wrong. When the Big Bitch gets tired of putting up with the balding chimps (humans), she’s going to make some changes in the planetary hierarchy. Unable to tolerate their pompous attitudes and destructive behaviors, Ms. El Natural intends to gargle with COVID-19 and rid herself of that obnoxious beast, known as man, that is embarrassing her with bad breath. However, just like Listerine, it only kills 99.9% of the bacteria that infects the mouth. Just like the arrogant dinosaurs who had to go, they passed their positive traits to birds. When man goes extinct, Nature will pass on that enlarged brain on to a species that deserves it. When the bottlenose dolphins run the planet, intelligent lifeforms that avoided earth will now stop often. In the old days of human reign, the aliens stopped coming because they wouldn’t shut up.

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