CHEST THUMPERS

7/1/2020

The flora and fauna world carries a small packet of high-grade elixir in the male gender. This powerful chemical can range from a powder in plants to a semi viscous fluid in others that are manufactured by special organs. They are dispersed by quivering components fired by select pulsating triggers. The discharging weapon that fires these magic bullets cums in many designs, but the pistol, rifle, or cannon stands ready to unload its vital trajectile when the order is given. The trigger that fires these slugs of sentience is a chemical chain of command that starts in the central nervous system and cascades down the ranks known as hormones. When fully developed in adolescents, daily exercises take place that keeps the system in top working order. These test fires are known as masterbation and, like the DEFCON system of the US military, it is ranked from level 5 (an erection) to level 1 (an ejaculation). This delivery system is activated by radar stations placed throughout the body. Sight, smell, hearing, and tactile sensations are all inputs that lowers the DEFCON status and prepares for a launch. At times, due to wiring malfunctions, a launch could take place into another male, but nature pulls out all the stops to see which way is the best and decides a million years later if that path worked. If not, the creature is scrapped and thrown into the bone museum to be unearthed by another species down the road. In time, the correct target is acquired, and the species carries on for at least one more generation. The drawback to this system is the hormonal overlord, testosterone, that pushes weaker males out of the way in order to gain a monopoly on their traits. Diversity is guaranteed, as the underdogs occasionally challenge the apex predators. This presents itself in everyday events, such as when driving on a 4-lane highway and the right lane ahead is closed. Even in light traffic, with your blinker on, the chest thumper will not let you in. War it is.

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