DARK PHOTONS II

2/10/2019

The scientific community is reviewing a recently discovered new concept. Previously, Dark Matter came on the scene in 1933 when a Swiss astrophysicist postulated its existence from observations at Caltech. Dark Energy was added to the theoretical toolbox in 1998 when 2 independent teams arrived at the same findings, hinting at its existence. Moore’s Law now comes into account and accurately predicts that information will double every year. Today it has been revealed that a new form of light wave has been discovered and its scientific breakthrough could earn its researchers a lucrative Nobel prize. Scientists Amal Hatfield and Junior McCoy are employed at the Dew Drop University located in Holler County, West Virginia. The two are both Road Scholars from the time they were incarcerated at the Hooterville County Jail and worked on the chain gangs, building rural roads. Their daily chores exposed them to heavy physical work and earned them a degree in physics. While working on these projects, the pair observed that the light behind an object was darker in color than the surrounding light and created shadows. They called their discovery DARK PHOTONS and submitted their papers to a prestigious scientific review committee who were amazed that this phenomenon had not been unearthed previously. They postulated that these energy waves could pass through matter unimpeded whereas normal photons were absorbed by the media. The physics behind this is being argued vehemently by the two scientists and has erupted into a full-blown feud. Dr. Amal Hatfield’s version is that shadows are the result of Dark Photons passing through a low mass object and are being reflected by the high mass earth. Dr. Junior McCoy states that the soul of the illuminated object allows Dark Photons to pass through like legal citizens at the border creating a shadow, while illegals (photons) are captured and held. Dr. McCoy’s proof for this is that soulless vampires have no shadows. 

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