WAITRESS WOES IV

5/13/2021 

Most carpenters sport tool belts with pockets and loops for hardware (nails) and specialized implements (hammer and tape measure) as they perform their jobs. Electricians use a different style of belt that provides access to many types of hand tools required in their trade, including channel locks and a lineman’s pliers. Doctors wear a stethoscope, and cops carry a gun. So, the question arises; what specialty tools must a waitress tote around to perform her functions? In the old days, it was a pad of lined paper and a pencil to take the customer’s order, plus possibly a custom uniform to denote their job position with her name tag, and that was it. Now in today’s electronic world, she carries with her an electronic tablet that is imprinted with the entire menu and all the condiments that can be selected. As the patron chooses that which the hunger switch is selecting, she hits her screen where it is projected to a highly visible monitor in the kitchen so that the chef can read it without the penmanship distortions that would occur on those ancient restaurant checks. This also prevents a waitress from giving a bill with an undocumented item away for free. Technology: sometimes it pays for itself. The uniforms have also been upgraded so as to enhance the theme of the restaurant. Now, it’s period dress for historical locations or pantsuits to convey professionalism. Also, sexy outfits with fishnet stockings promote large tips from male customers who thinks that he’ll “catch” a waitress with a $20 gratuity. With the changing attitudes of women in the workplace, additional “tools” have been placed at her disposal to ensure her safety from the drunken wolves who prey on the restaurants’ work force. Hidden body cameras and microphones survey the masses, and the recorded evidence is shipped off to contract counselors who file electronic lawsuits against the perpetrators. Designer stun guns and bear spray cans complete the attire of the waitresses of tomorrow. 

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