ERECTIONS

7/3/2022       

The almighty inseminators that are loosely attached to the male mammal anatomy are a complete subject matter that can literally stand on their own. The human versions are the most studied as doctors, enhancers, stimulators, researchers, rebuilders, and writers make a living on recording all the engineering variations that the pocket python can display. Trying to pre-dickt the growth rate, curve, length, and endurance that this human hot dog can display is difficult, but some companies will take your HARD-earned money and sell you expensive products that don’t work. The entire erection operation is automatic and is influenced by whore-mones and nature to reproduce. The penis is also used by women as an intimacy tool that doubles as a bacterial swabbing plunger to purge the vagina during those spring-cleaning moments. This causes her to moan appreciatively because of the fact that someone else is doing all the dirty work. Like a garden hose on a reel, the hose must be pulled off to its full length to effectively put out any fires down below. Whimy, sprayless, and flimsy tubing will not cut the mess-turd in the flaccid state. Blood flow is paramount to waking up “Little Dick” and turning him into the superhero known as: The Hunk. As old age progresses, this red ramming fluid is drastically curtailed, and Boner Appétit shrinks away to cocktail weenie status. This is where the Snake Oil Shysters make a fortune, trying to resurrect Mr. Pathetic Pee-Pee. You do not need these scoundrels. For $11.47 you can buy a 94-pound bag of Portland cement. Merely drill a 3″ hole through your mattress and box spring clear to the floor and learn how to sleep on your stomach with your dinky dong dangling in that expansion tube. Always drink a 16 oz. glass of water with 1 tablespoon of Portland Cement mixed in. In a month’s time, your crank will become permanently huge and rock hard and your improvised vaginal swabbing skills will make you the penis envy of the entire neighborhood.  

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